Last year at this time, I had no idea what was coming. I was living in my own mother’s house (again), I was buried in motherhood of two little children… almost 3 and almost 1 year old girls. I was drowning in poop, breastfeeding, spit up, an in-home daycare business, my marriage…I hardly had time to think, let alone think of myself.
This year I think about motherhood and the word that most describes the mothering I experienced and the mothering I want my children to experience is peace. I was given a big dose of humility, reality, and what life should really be about. Cancer completely changed my lens on life.
Every time I set foot in my mom’s house I am washed over with peace. When I receive her big, momma bear hugs I am restored with peace.
I was raised in a house full of love. My mom showed us love at every angle, in every chapter… at times it may have been tough love (oh how I dread those teenage years) … but, it was love. My mom is now my very best friend. The moment I went away to college I remember being flooded with emotion for the relationship I had with my mom, it is like God spoke into my spirit to tell me how important my mom was to me. I didn’t fully realize it until I went away to school. From that point forward, I wanted to spend as much time with her as I could. I yearned for her zest for life, her smile, her way of bringing joy and happiness to everyone around her. We celebrated everything. She may not have been rich monetarily, but she was rich in love. My birthdays and holidays with her were always my favorite, not for the gifts, but for the thoughtfulness, the pouring of love into all she did, the attention to detail. I soaked it up.
Today my mom is my very best friend, I love talking to her about anything and everything, I love our days together and special occasions together. I love the joy she brings to my heart. I love the peace I feel when I am around her. I love all that she has taught me about motherhood, and how I pray to God every night that I can give this love, peace, selflessness, and joy to my girls.
This year I look at motherhood and I am grateful to God for this beautiful gift. I am grateful cancer chose me and not my girls. I am grateful to be alive to see their gorgeous faces grow in grace. I am excited for all the years I get to pour my love into my beautiful girls’ lives, to teach them about grace, humility, tact, choosing joy, being kind, being a blessing to others, how important it is to serve others and how one day I will get to watch them become mothers themselves.
What words stir up in your heart at Mother’s Day?